Fredas, 12th Hearthfire, 4E 201 & Loredas, 13th Hearthfire, 4E 201

Rigmor of Bruma quest: Rigmor of Bruma.

It was just past 10:00 PM when we exited Darklight Tower.

Rigmor asked, “Are we going to check out the ship?”

“No. I am sick of killing for today.”

We gathered our horses then headed for Sethri’s farm.

There was still very little civilian traffic on the roads but plenty of Imperial and Stormcloak patrols looking for any New Order troops trying to escape.

We made it to the farm without incident just after 5:00 AM.

Sethri was sitting outside.

I said to him, “Sethri, look, my head is still attached!”

“News travels fast Dragonborn, news travel fast.”

“I see a lack of horses. Has everybody else left?”

“I will give you the news inside. Meanwhile, there are some presents for you. Look on the workbench in the stable.”

“Will do.”

“They were special delivery! I have a present for you too, Rigmor. Come inside, and all will be revealed.”

Rigmor replied, “Really, that’s so cute. I will be inside in a minute.”

Sethri went into the farmhouse, and Rigmor said to me, “Dragonborn, this is going to be harder than I thought.”

“Let us try and make our last trip together, for a while anyway, full of good memories.”

“I won’t cry if you don’t!”

“Then we will be sobbing before we reach halfway!”

“Go see what these ‘presents’ are my silly Dragonborn.”

Rigmor entered the farmhouse, and I went to the stable.

The presents consisted of a beautiful Khajiit longbow and quiver of arrows, Goldbrand, or replica thereof, from Boethia and a reconstructed Azura’s Bane.

I sat and looked over the lake. I wanted to compose myself. I was battling my emotions already, and I didn’t want that. I wanted Rigmor to cross the border, knowing I was confident we would be together again soon. But I was so full of doubt.

A persistent murmuring reached me at times like this when I am sitting quietly at night and under the stars.

I looked up at the sky and concentrated. It was just like being in a noisy tavern. Numerous conversations are happening, but you can’t quite make out the words of any one of them. The noise is randomly increasing and decreasing in volume.

After twenty minutes of staring at swans swimming and stars twinkling, I made my way inside the farmhouse.

Rigmor was in her old armour!

I sat at the table,

  • Wulf: Sethri, where has everybody gone?
  • Sethri: Baa’Ren-Dar is taking Sigunn home.
  • Rigmor: Baa’Ren-Dar has already acquired our old house.
  • Sethri: I said Sigunn could stay with me, she gasped a little, thanked me for my good nature and went with the old Khajiit.
  • Rigmor: Guess what Yngol did?
  • Wulf: He took Sorella and Angi up the mountains. He is going to build a new house for them and maybe stay. He told me after the battle.
  • Sethri: I guess you’ll be taking young Rigmor back to Bruma then?
  • Wulf: We haven’t decided whether to part ways at the border or for me to take her to Bruma.
  • Rigmor: I’ll go weigh poor Ben down and wait for you outside.
  • Wulf: Please stay. I have a feeling that things are being kept from you. Am I right, Sethri?
  • Sethri: Ah…
  • Wulf: Let us start with something easy. Who retrieved Rigmor’s armour and the bits of Azura’s Bane?
  • Sethri: The mages were all over the portal, I mean Oblivion Gate, site.
  • Wulf: So Malesam gave them to you. You then took the pieces of the sword to Azura’s Shrine near Winterhold, and she remade it. Correct?
  • Sethri: Yes, think of it as a present from both of us.
  • Wulf: Goldbrand is from Boethia as a thank you to her Champion.
  • Sethri: Champion?
  • Wulf: Yes, I am also Azura’s Champion.
  • Sethri: I knew that!
  • Wulf: The longbow is from Baa’Ren-Dar and is excellent. But I think he left something else, didn’t he?
  • Sethri: Yes, a note, but Baa’Ren-Dar said it was for your eyes only.
  • Wulf: Just hand it over. I keep no secrets from Rigmor.

I broke the diplomatic seal on the note, and it read,


This one has been recalled, but Khajiit needed to let you know, the Emperor Titus Mede II has restored Rigmor’s family name. The Emperor took it upon himself to inform me just before he crushed the enemy in Cyrodiil. This one was going to tell you earlier, but thought it could wait until after the New Order was defeated in Skyrim.

This one shall be taking Sigunn to Bruma and help her get established before returning to Elsweyr. We would be eternally grateful if you could escort Rigmor to the border with Cyrodiil, it will be safe for her to travel from there, as this one knows you also have your destiny to fulfil in Skyrim. Kaza’Zhid has had a premonition that you will become legendary, and save Tamriel many, many times over.

Rigmor is to become Countess of Bruma. This one thanks you, Dragonborn, for being her Guardian, we owe you a great debt of gratitude. What a wonderful day, don’t you think?


I handed the letter to Rigmor, who quickly read it.

  • Rigmor: Dragonborn, it says many, many times!”
  • Wulf: That is not unexpected. We will just have to deal with what comes.
  • Rigmor: Yes, I know. It is just a shock to see it confirmed.
  • Wulf: I can’t believe Baa’Ren-Dar just assumed I would leave Rigmor at the border. That is not his decision to make.
  • Sethri: Dragonborn, my Mistress wanted me to warn you that taking Rigmor across the border would put her in danger. She’s been looking after he all her life, and she’s never wrong.
  • Wulf: And did Azura say why?
  • Sethri: Azura isn’t sure, but she can feel ripples in the void. There’s some heavy grinding going on. If that old Khajiit wants you to stay behind and send her off alone, there must be a bloody good reason.
  • Wulf: I am still to hear a good reason.
  • Sethri: Well something isn’t right, and I don’t just mean dragons are coming back. There is something to it. Something way bigger. I mean, that old Khajiit’s been staying at the temple of Mara right, ever wonder about that one? It means he’s got the ear of the gods. Dinya told me herself. Mara is a step away from the old man himself, right? As I said, there must be a good reason they don’t want you anywhere beyond that border. Any ideas why that is?
  • Wulf: Why would the High Priestess of the Riften Temple of Mara tell you anything.
  • Sethri: Yeah, means and ways Dragonborn, means and ways.
  • Wulf: Sethri, Azura has not looked after Rigmor very well at all!
    • She did not stop her family from being torn apart.
    • She did not stop Ragnar’s execution.
    • She did not stop Sigunn and Rigmor becoming slaves.
    • She did not stop the beatings and whippings that almost killed Rigmor.
    • She did not tell Baa’Ren-Dar about Rigmor’s captivity. He found her by chance and rescued her.
    • She did not heal Rigmor after the Bruma Embassy, Angi did.
    • She did not heal Rigmor after she leapt off a cliff, Rose and I did.
    • She did not stop Rigmor being kidnapped by the New Order.
    • She did not rescue Rigmor from the sacrificial dais, I did.
    • She did not help Rigmor recover from the poison administered by the New Order.
    • She did not help Rigmor rediscover herself in time to turn up at the battle yesterday.
  • Rigmor: She helped Wulf even when her power on Nirn was diminished, and for that, we are both eternally grateful. She said she manipulated people, and it is impossible to tell what that involved. For instance, she sent you to us, and that helped! 
  • Wulf: It does not mean we do not admire her or respect her best wishes for Rigmor. But you need to realise, as Malesam has, that what Daedric Princes claim they can do is exaggerated.
  • Sethri: Well, what about the ripples in the void?
  • Wulf: It has something to do with the infinite timelines, but I have to learn enough about how that all works. Azura relies on her seers, and I assume she might suspect some significant event is coming, but no seer foresight has let her know what it may be as yet.
  • Sethri: What about Baa’Ren-Dar and Mara?
  • Wulf: Apart from the blatant lie that Dinya would knock boots with you? She is a Senior Priestess of Mara and married to the Head Priest of the Riften Temple. She would be excommunicated if she broke the sacred marriage vows that she administers! And why would she risk all for a dalliance with an agent of a Daedric Prince?
  • Sethri: Well, um…
  • Wulf: Mara is the Mother Cat in the Khajiit pantheon and is worshipped by them. There is nothing strange about Baa’Ren-Dar staying in Lady Mara’s temple. As for having the ears of the gods. The Priest and Priestesses speak to Lady Mara and receive directions on who needs help with relationship problems. People pray to Lady Mara, and she passes on the relevant information to them. If The Divines wanted Baa’Ren-Dar to know something, they might very well tell one of the Priests or Priestesses to pass on a message to him. But you would think Baa’Ren-Dar would have said that to me in the note you just handed to me. He didn’t, but that may just be an error on his part.
  • Rigmor: We suspect there is far more in our future together, our destinies entwined, and that may be why Wulf can’t cross the border. But if anybody is to be given that reason, it should be my Dragonborn and not Baa’Ren-Dar!
  • Wulf: The information that was in that note should have been given to me by Baa’Ren-Dar as soon as he knew it. Lucky for Rigmor and me we knew it days ago because Malesam told us. And no, it has nothing to do with anything Boethia told him. Neither Boethia nor Azura knew of it.
  • Rigmor: Malesam also wanted to dictate when I should get the information in Baa’Ren-Dar’s note. He had no right to decide that, and neither did Baa’Ren-Dar!
  • Wulf: Sethri should be told.
  • Rigmor: You’re right.
  • Wulf: Tendril Sethri, let me introduce to you, Rigmor Ragnarsdottier, Countess of Bruma.
  • Sethri: What? Why? How?
  • Rigmor: Emperor Mede offered me the vacant position as compensation for what happened to my family.
  • Wulf: If I had said goodbye to Rigmor at the border at the same time as telling her that, it would not have been a pleasant experience for either of us! Also, that was a damn big ripple in the void, don’t you think? Azura did not know because she is not omnipotent.
  • Rigmor: None of this secrecy is your fault, Sethri!
  • Sethri: That Countess thing should have been told to you earlier than the day the Dragonborn is supposed to say goodbye at the border!
  • Wulf: We appreciate all that you have done for us and the people of Skyrim. I hope we have not upset you.
  • Sethri: I understand you are just trying to set the record straight. It has been my pleasure to help.
  • Wulf: Any shortcuts to the border than an upstanding citizen such as yourself might accidentally have discovered?
  • Sethri: It just so happens there is an old smuggler’s route not far from here. It will bring you out at an abandoned trading post not far from the actual border crossing.
  • Wulf: Please mark it on my map.

Sethri did so then handed me back the map.

  • Wulf: Thanks, Sethri. That will save time, and I can get rid of the brat earlier!
  • Rigmor: Thank the gods I don’t have to put up with the Dragonbum much longer.
  • Sethri: If by perchance, you are around this way, and happen to be saving the world all over again. Feel free to stop by anytime.
  • Wulf: That could be quite often according to Baa’Ren-Dar’s ‘soothsayer’.
  • Sethri: Haha, farewell Dragonborn and Countess Rigmor of Bruma.

We exited the farmhouse. Rigmor hugged Lydia goodbye and gave Meeko a good pat.

I said to Lydia, “I am taking Rigmor to the border by myself.”

“I understand. Just remember, it is only temporary.”

“But for how long? That is what we don’t know. That is the uncertainty.”

“We will wait for you at Breezehome.”

“We will start hunting Alduin soon. You will get your revenge.”

“I am looking forward to it, my Thane.”

I walked over to Rigmor.

“Are you ready to go?”

“We could take the longer route to Falkreath.”

“It will not make it any easier Rigmor.”

“You’re right.”

“Come on, let me take you home.”

“Lead the way my silly, wonderful and only slightly smelly Dragonborn.”

As we were riding away, Lydia yelled, “The goat wants to stay here!”

I yelled back, “I think he will find us if he wants to. Don’t worry about him!”

We rode in silence. Any brevity would have sounded false and forced. The mood was lighter when standing in Helgen while waiting for the chop!

The melancholy increased when I saw Legionnaires escorting a Stormcloak Prisoner. It looks like the civil war is restarting before all of the New Order are even rounded up!

The beginning of the snow line told us we were getting very close to the border crossing. Rigmor showed her nervousness with overly excited chatter.

At one point she said, “Hey, wait till you see our old house in Bruma. I think we will still keep it even if living in a draughty old castle. I can’t wait until you are living with us. I am going to show you the Imperial City! We can go hunting together in the Great Forest. You are so going to love it in Cyrodiil.”

Withing seconds of Rigmor saying that The Greybeards called me to High Hrothgar once more. My compass started, and I knew that is where it pointed.

Rigmor asked, “Why are they calling you?”

“My compass has just started. It must have something to do with Alduin.”

“You don’t have to turn around and go now! Do you?”

“No, my beloved.”

We rode through the old border checkpoint.

Then we stopped at a rest point within view of the Cyrodiil border.

We both sat down and just stared at each other.

I eventually said, “I don’t think I should risk crossing the border until we are sure about what Baa’Ren-Dar knows.”

“So even if you defeat Alduin you may not be able to visit Cyrodiil?”

“That does not mean you can’t come to Skyrim!”

“We could just ride away now. I can always ride to Bruma later!”

“No Rigmor, we can’t do that. You need to establish yourself in Bruma. You will have a lot to learn in a short amount of time. Many people will be relying on you. A lot of vermin will be hunting you.”

“I need you. I can’t do this on my own.”

“You won’t be alone. But that is what scares me the most. How will you be treated by your ‘advisors’?”

“What do you mean?”

“People will make assumptions about your capabilities. Even your mother only knows the fourteen-year-old Rigmor. Baa’Ren-Dar is used to making decisions for you and has not come to terms with your independence. Malesam’s arrogance may lead him to believe he always knows what is best.”

“You think they will not listen to me?”

“They did not see you do that speech to the Sons of Talos. They did not see you lead soldiers in battle. They do not know the young woman who is Rigmor Ragnarsdottier. Even Yngol and Casius talked about you as if you are a young girl, a child.”

“But I will need advice. It will all be new to me.”

“Listen to all the advice offered but make sure important decisions are yours! You will be held responsible, so you need to have confidence in yourself.”

“How can I have confidence without you there?”

“You jumped on Ben, rode to Yngol’s camp and issued orders to veteran troops. You led them into battle! I was not with you when you did that. I was not with you when you decided to take revenge on those inside the Bruma Embassy. You have to prove to those around you that you are competent. Throw your authority around if you have to. You are the Countess, and they are your advisors, not your equals or superiors.”

“You are scared. You are trying to sound calm, but I know you too well to be fooled, my silly Dragonborn.”

“Yes, I am terrified. No matter what I will always be your Guardian. If you were just going home, I would still worry. But you are walking into that cesspool of Cyrodiil Politics. They are brutal and will have no sympathy or mercy for one new at the game. Use your advisors but be confident with your decisions! The other players will be like a ravenous pack of wolves and will smell easy prey. I want you to rip the throats out of those who get in your way. Only then will they respect Rigmor Ragnarsdottier. Only then will you be able to have friends amongst them.”

“I don’t want to be like them!”

“You just have to convince others that you are like them. The people of Bruma need you to represent their best interests when playing that rancid game. Others will try and move in on your trade deals and other things that could adversely affect your people.”

“I did not think we would be discussing politics on the border.”

“I am sorry. Perhaps I am trying to delay the goodbye.”

“When we are apart, promise me you will write to me. That you will answer the hundreds of letters that I send you!”

“I promise, and I will look forward to every one of them.”

“We just don’t know, do we. We are saying goodbye without any idea of when we can say hello once more.”

“We are one heart, one soul and one shared destiny. Nothing will get in the way of our love. We are meant to be together and will be again!”

Rigmor stood and said, “I will be forever yours. You know that and never fear it will change. Walk me over to Ben. It is time for the new Countess to make an appearance.”

We were halfway to the horses when Rigmor started to cry. I grabbed her, lifted her and we cried together.

The only thing that stopped the sobs was a kiss that expressed our love more than mere words can hope to do.

The kiss ended then it took all our willpower to let go of each other’s hands. Rigmor stopped stepping on tippy-toes. I stopped slouching. At any time in the past, our comedic difference in height would have had us laughing. Instead, Rigmor looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes and smiled.

Rigmor quickly walked to and mounted Ben. The quiet that we share rode away with her.

Rigmor stopped then turned Ben so she could face me.

She yelled, “I love you, my silly, beautiful, Dragonborn!”

In my emotional state, I didn’t judge the strength or aim of my Thu’um very well.


Rigmor went flying off the back of Ben

I was going to run down to make sure she wasn’t hurt. But Rigmor got up, brushed herself off and remounted Ben.

She then galloped toward the border gate and yelled, “Not cool, Dragonborn, not cool!”

Then Rigmor laughed that laugh and rode into Cyrodiil.

My vision dimmed. My mind shut down.

I awoke over an hour later, face first in the snow.

I knelt then went through the same process as on the carriage to Helgen.

Who am I? Where am I?

I had one impulse. I had to protect Rigmor! I knew I loved her, but that was all. What she looked like I could not recall.

I saw the border gate and started walking towards Cyrodiil.

I stared at the border gate. An image of a laughing Rigmor riding Ben through it pierced the protective barrier my brain had raised.

My memories since Helgen came flooding back in a sequence. It was like I was reading my journal from the start but at a rapid speed. With each memory, the associated emotions surfaced. The memories ended with Rigmor crossing the border that was mere feet in front of me. I was in danger of falling into the blackness once more!

I grasped at the only other memories I had. I replayed all seven hundred and thirty-nine kills. The details of each kill as if it was happening before me in real-time. I held my head in my hands and screamed.

When the Aedriath in my head finally died, I was anchored back in reality. I understood the here, the now. And I understood my predicament.

I can’t do The Divine tasks without some idea of what is going on. Did Baa’Ren-Dar receive information that I have not? Will I ever get to see my Rigmor again? Will she need her Dragonborn and he can’t come to her aid?

I am supposed to save Nirn and its people many, many times. That is according to a seer who is, in fact, a disciple of Azura. Why do followers of other gods know more than I do?

I closed my eyes and prayed, “I need help. Give me something with which I can work. My life since awakening has revolved around Rigmor. I cannot think of anything else. I do not know how to move forward.”

I do not recall much from that point forward till he appeared. I vaguely remember looking down at twilight to the Imperial City.

The next thing I remember was staring into the fire at the rest stop.

“My Son, you will see her again.”

I grumbled, “Am I dying again. Who stabbed me this time?”

“Look at me.”

I looked across to the stump, and sitting upon it was a familiar figure. Not familiar because of the statues of him all over Skyrim. I simply knew him.

The elderly warrior wore Colovian armour that went out of fashion centuries ago. I could see how Imperial armour developed from it. He had piercing blues eyes, a trimmed beard and white hair.

I said to him, “Why are you bothering me? Matters of the heart are what ail me, and you would know nothing on that subject!”

“Lord Akatosh does not like it when I use this aspect. It contains my understanding of all the mortal emotions gathered during my time on Nirn. I must be careful lest I slip and ruin great plans.”

“So, you are like a Dwemer automaton, a mechanical man, that thinks it knows love?”

“I am here to help. Maybe you don’t remember calling for such mere hours ago. But I would have come anyway. You are knowledgeable about such things and know how difficult this is for us to do. I advise you to show appreciation for such an effort by putting away your bitterness and listening!”

“You are only here because your tool is broken and you need to repair it. You have other things that need fixing, and no other tool can be made in time. Why not just blank my memory again and wake me up when and where required? It would be less cruel!”

“We did not do that to be cruel, and I apologise on behalf of The Nine. We did it because we needed you and still do. So does every mortal on Nirn, including your beloved Rigmor!”

He stood up and moved in front of the fire. Like any soldier posted in a cold region, he showed great relief in just warming his hands over the open flames. I joined him on the opposite side and waited.

He looked at me and said, “Ahh…one of the most looked forward to rewards after a night on patrol! Whose stupid idea was it not to issue underwear?”

My mind flashed back to Rigmor, asking, ‘I want to know if the Legionnaires wear underwear?’ She had burst into uncontrollable laughter, and every time I looked at her sternly, her laugh would renew.

I smiled at the memory, and my heart ached.

“If I can show an understanding of humour, why not trust me where love is concerned?”

“I know it would be useless to pursue why you wiped my memory. I accept it was necessary. But now you ask me to abandon the only comfort I have had since awakening. You want me to continue doing my Divine Tasks without Rigmor by my side. You ask too much. Rigmor and I are supposed to be together. We are as one, and now you have cut us asunder!”

“You are destined to meet again. We want you to meet again. We need you to meet again.”

“How? When? Where? In what capacity? Can you guarantee this? Can you swear that Rigmor will be safe?”

“I am here to help, but there are restrictions. You know how things work. We need you to perform many tasks before your reunion. I will not give you information that endangers the completion of those tasks.”

I was trying to stay calm. I could ask many questions only to be denied answers. I decided just to let him tell me what is allowed.

“Then tell me what is permitted.”

“We need Rigmor and you to be together again. It matters not if lovers, friends, enemies or guardian. Our preference is for you to renew your loving and intimate relationship. It increases the chances of completing the tasks, and we find joy in it.

Rigmor is now in Cyrodiil, and a high ranking noble. You know that fact alone makes her a playing piece in their games of power. We must rely on those mortals around her to keep her safe, and so must you. Nothing is guaranteed.

You can’t meet her until we need you to. You can’t contact her. This disconnection is necessary!”

My anger surfaced, and I yelled, “You can’t guarantee Rigmor will be safe. You can’t tell me when we will meet again. You can’t guarantee we will renew our relationship, just that it is a preference.  You say I can’t contact her to express my continuing love or let her know why I have not visited or written. You want me to maintain this discipline for an unknown amount of time.”

I looked him in the eyes and said, “No! Somewhere in my past, you have got to know me. Of that, I am certain! I am telling you that I can’t do as The Nine ask!”

Great anger emanated from this being. It would make most mortals shake with fear, yet it just increased my determination to get something more. I needed more.

He said, “I have tried it their way, and as I warned them, it will not work. Yes, I know you and what you say is true. You can’t just do as they ask.”

“I thought The Nine agreed on all things.”

“We have differences, but we still work as one. That is why we are currently winning against the seventeen that squabble amongst themselves.”


“Let me explain what is at stake.

The love you share with Rigmor is an extraordinary bond that we would like to continue for its beauty and wonder. It is unique and potent.

But it does not matter how much you want something to happen; you can’t force it to happen. Even the gods have to work within this limitation.

You know this!

Your ongoing angst only increases your suffering and increases the chances of failure.

I will put this as plainly as I can.

Nirn is facing danger, unlike anything previously!

There are two possible outcomes.

We know you being in the presence of Rigmor will lead to the desired outcome.

That outcome is the continued existence of Nirn.

The other outcome is unending darkness!

We cannot see past a particular point and do not know if you are ever successful.

That is why you must continue to do the tasks we assign.

You must do them to save Rigmor, Mundus and The Divines.

We have no other who can do this.”

“The tell me why I am expected to cut all ties with Rigmor? Make it easier for me to complete these Divine Tasks.”

“Records of your time with Rigmor will disappear. The identity of Rigmor’s Guardian will be a mystery the best spies cannot unravel. You must be a surprise to our enemy. Otherwise, they can prepare for your coming. Anybody you come to love would be in danger. Like Aedriath did not factor Rigmor’s Guardian in his plans, we do not want our adversary to factor you in.”

“You are worried that if I cross the border into Cyrodiil that I will try and help Rigmor and I would become her Guardian once more.”

“Precisely. The other eight wanted all ties cut between Rigmor and you until a time in the future. Do not ask me how long that would have been for I cannot compromise the plan more than I am about to.”

“You know that long disconnect from Rigmor would have severely reduced my chances of completing the tasks. The constant wonder and worry. The yearning and fighting against my impulse to go to her, or at least contact her, would be a distraction. The knowing that Rigmor would be confused and then angry and then sad at my lack of contact would eat away at me.”

“That is why I am telling you this. I will give Rigmor and you a way to be together. It has to be done without others finding out where Rigmor has gone or that she is with you. I need not lecture you on what would be wise when you are together. Rigmor must be in Cyrodiil for certain events. You must stay away from Cyrodiil. Her absence cannot be for extended periods. Until then there can be no contact. Not even letters. The Khajiit, Baa’Ren-Dar, will explain this to Rigmor. He will not tell her you can meet again soon. He must not know that fact. I will contact Rigmor and tell her what I have told you.”

“The other Divines wanted total disconnection up to a particular point. Are you allowing Rigmor and me to see each other up to that point?”

“No, that cannot occur. But first, you have to complete certain tasks, and Rigmor has to establish herself in Bruma before I will allow you to see each other. Any future disconnection would be considerably shorter than what the other eight had wanted.”

“You are risking all by trusting Rigmor and me can be discreet. That is quite a level of trust, and I appreciate it. I will not let you down.”

“You never have.”

‘Will I ever see you again?”

“I can’t say because I do not know. Maybe other aspects of me. If so, I apologise beforehand. They speak in that fancy non-direct way you hate.”

“Mumbo jumbo?”

“Yes, that. And do not concern yourself with the gobblygook. Even to us, there are things beyond our knowledge. Just shrug your shoulders and move on.”

“Can I ask one more thing?”

“Of course, my Son, but you know the rules, and I must leave soon.”

“I have commanded many fine men who co-operated to defend Skyrim. Within days they will start killing each other again. The right to worship Talos is one of the catalysts to the civil war.

Have you told a mortal that this is necessary? That such deaths are justified?”

“Our power is not dependent on how many worshippers we have.

We are not offended by Gods of other pantheons being worshipped. You know that quite often they are aspects of The Nine anyway.

Our only enemies are the Daedra who wish to end all that we find joy in, including the mortals on Nirn.

We like to have many followers as that allows for more temples.

More temples mean more chances to interact with and sometimes instruct mortals.

Any temple can be used by us and by any worshipper.

Let the Thalmor destroy a few Temples. They are worshippers of The Divines who have gone astray.

It would not stop Talos from being worshipped or his contact with mortals.

The Stormcloaks are wrong to use Talos to justify the worst kind of warfare.

Neither Thalmor nor Stormcloak has received instruction from any of us.”

“I thank you. I know I love you as more than my God. The wiping of my memory did not erase that fact.”

“That is why I thought you might like a lucky coin. Shh, don’t tell Lord Akatosh.”

He tossed a coin, and I watched the coin’s flight then caught it. When I looked to where he had been, Talos was gone.

I looked at the coin. On one side was the familiar Dragon symbol representing Akatosh. On the other was a representation of Empress Kintyra. It was minted 3E45.

I sat staring at it for ages. There was so much about Kintyra that reminded me of Rigmor.

After some time, I shrugged and put it in a secure pocket inside my armour. Next to a slightly squished and faded red mountain flower.

I would do my best to complete the tasks set by The Divines; however long it takes.

I will miss the presence of Rigmor on occasions.

I will carry her laughter wherever I go.

I will see the world through her eyes and therefore, the beauty that once was hidden.

Rigmor and I will see each other much sooner than eight of The Nine thought wise. But what has wisdom got to do with love?

I went over to Hashire and gave him a good serving of oats and retrieved my sleeping roll. I rolled it out inside the small tent then curled up on top with my sword by my side.

I know not what time I fell asleep.

The Old Man knocked on Breezehome’s door. Meeko went wild inside with excited barking, and Lydia told him to hush and behave himself. She opened the door, and Talos told her, “Wulf will need your help. Here is his map and where he is.”

Rigmor took the map and watched as the old man patted Meeko then walked away.

Lydia asked Meeko, “Do you want to go visit Wulf?”


“We will go after I have finished eating my Apple and Cabbage Stew. How come you have not touched yours?”

Meeko made gagging sounds then played dead.

“Well, there is a rather smelly rabbit that was not cured properly. It might be full of maggots and rotten meat. Will that do?”

Meeko came alive and gave Lydia his biggest grin.

“Come on then.”

Lydia closed the door to Breezehome the same time Rigmor closed the door to her old bedroom in Bruma.

Wulf dreamt of his arms open wide and a little girl running to him. Her hair was full of wheat, and the neighbour’s puppy was chasing her ankles. He looked over at their house, and Rigmor was sitting on the veranda with a cold drink waiting for him. What more could a man want out of life?

14 thoughts on “Fredas, 12th Hearthfire, 4E 201 & Loredas, 13th Hearthfire, 4E 201

  1. I have been reluctant to read these last few entwries knowing where it would lead. I can say this fir certain this ine literally had me crying. People say men dont cry I say bullshit this is enough to make anyone cry, especially me. I consider myself to be an empath and if you dont kniw what that is let me englighten thise who dont, I can pit myself into the shoes of others amd feel their emotions. Even though this is a video game, the character’s were so developed the were like real people in a since with emotions, pain, a story even. Reading the final words of this entry, I put myself into Wulf’s shoes and felt every moment leading to and at the border. The way Jim did this was amazing amd you just added to the emotion factor Ten-fold. I personally dont know whats going to happen next in the enteries but its bound to be hard to do without Rigmor. Saying this i end this already long enough comment with this, it will bw a short but long wait for the RoC and RoC:D reboots. Until then this will be a beginning to treasure.

  2. Just checked to see if there was another entry, the last one. Read the last couple of lines only and immediately started to tear up, not looking forward to reading this tonight. Totally agree with James. Will comment again after reading this, pffft, it’s only a game, yeah right.

    1. The very last paragraph and i quote ” Wulf dreamt of his arms open wide and a little girl running to him. Her hair was full of wheat, and the neighbour’s puppy was chasing her ankles. He looked over at their house, and Rigmor was sitting on the veranda with a cold drink waiting for him. What more could a man want out of life?” had me in tears and also got me thinking; Is this a prelude to something great? Anyway Ian bring a bix of tissues and if you need to soeak on what youve read well go find a loved one or just talk in your head since thats the only coping mechanism.

  3. You sure know who to smack the emotions loose in all of us. I concur with Ian and James. You really out did yourself with this one. You are one Hell of an author my friend. Still waiting on that Book of all your journals combined lol. Well Done Mark. Thank You Thank You Thank You

  4. Boy oh boy, you didn’t let us down. Been thinking adout this all day, I think I got all the emotions out of the way because now I’m excited about reading the next installment. Lydia will be a good shoulder to lean on, didn’t Lydia take Wulf home last time? Thanh you Mark for an unforgettable reading experience.

  5. James, I just finished reading this again, yep, I got just as emotional as the first time but at least I had a box of tissues with me as you recommend.

    1. Yeah, i’ve gone back and read ALL of the old entries and am waiting on new ones, I’m really looking forward to the new Reboots coming early next year, I personally will take a few days of to play and enjoy them, not to mention having Campfire, iNeed, amd Frostfall enabled for an even better expsrience.

  6. Hey James, would you believe I have just finished reading these again.Third time now, still needed the tissues. I have to admire Marks writing ability these journals are a brilliant read.

  7. Err James, this is the fourth time now. Lydia and Rigmor closing their respective doors at the same time was a hit to my emotions, I liked that bit.

  8. Umm, I think I should get a life, six times now. Waiting for the RoC reboot. I have never read a book as often or as frequent as Wulf’s journals. Thank you Mark for this wonderful experience.

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